Monday, October 18, 2010

It still hurts

I lost my Grandma Betty, 2 weeks ago now. It's still hard to look at these photos. I've learned that early morning phone calls are never a good thing. I had the pleasure of my grandma's presence in my life for 34 years, and that's a blessing. She was so young when she had my mother, and I know most people don't get to enjoy a grandparent for that long. But it makes it infinitely harder to let them go. My grandma always made me laugh. Even as a child in a room full of adults I gravitated toward her like the sun. She was the only person who was at least as likely as I was to get into trouble. :)
This is one of only 2 photos I took at her funeral/wake. I just had to find a way to understand how final this was, as the entire out of state trip made with a dog and a child in 2 days was just surreal. I'll be honest, I love this picture, it's peaceful and beautiful and I needed that. I hope it doesn't seem strange that I took it, I don't think it's morbid at all. My mother needed my sister and I with her and I know now that it was important that I went.
As always, my grandma didn't look like herself at the wake. At all. I hate that. So I took this photo of her picture in the doorway. No matter what, I'll always remember my grandma golden tanned from the golf course, a martini in one hand and a cigarette in the other, with a little smirk cursing under her breath (that would make sailors blush). I love you grandma, and I'll miss you until we met again.
Until tomorrow. It's a Monday. :P

12 comments:

janel said...

I am so sorry. it is so difficult to lose a grandparent..and the memories that are so special become even more important and sacred. May all those smiles and laughs and the fun times be the memories that are emblazoned on your heart. Thinking of you!

Kelly Massman said...

So sorry for your loss!

mademoisellechitchat said...

Both you and your family are in my thoughts!

lisa said...

Hope you are ok Danielle. xx

NoraAnne said...

Hugs to you. What a wonderful picture of her and J. Such a special memory.

Keshet said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, Danielle. And it really is a beautiful photo, serene and peaceful. Not a weird thought at all.

Jody said...

My heart is with you on the loss of your Grandma. I am so sorry, Danielle.

Houston said...

Oh Danielle, I am so sorry for your loss. The photo is beautiful and your Grandma sounds like she was a such fun... may her enjoyment of life live on in you.

Vee said...

I am sorry to hear of your loss Danielle, it is never easy. hugs!!

BabyBokChoy said...

So sorry for your loss, condolences...

kristina proffitt said...

I'm so very sorry for your loss, Danielle. I'm praying for you and your family. BIG hugs to you.

Jill said...

Sending prayers and hugs your way. I'm so sorry for your loss.